Santa Clarita Diet “Review”

Drew Barrymore, I have to give it to you for your performance in the Netflix Original Santa Clarita Diet!  Usually, I’m not into horror-comedy, but these episodes packed with flesh eating flavor were a delight.  Sheila (Barrymore) is a realtor in the suburbs of sunny Santa Clarita, CA who turns zombie and devours anything in sight when she gets in the zone; drug dealers, rival sex-crazed realtors, and hardcore handicapped Nazis- she doesn’t discriminate!

Get that chocolate Sheila!

The show has tremendous entertainment value, but as I sipped my 40 oz., I imagined what would this show be like if Sheila was Shaquita and lived in an urban environment, like Inglewood, CA and her husband discovered she was “undead”.  Let’s put it this way, Shaquita’s husband (Tyrone) would not have been so accepting of this whole zombie gig.  It would have played out entirely different, with her husband stabbing her in her brain overnight.  

Seriously, there would be no sex life after finding this out, let’s face it a black man wouldn’t even sleep under the same roof, more or less be in the same room, even less likely give the undead the old long stroke. Joel (Tim Olyphant) was a freak with a laser focus on how he could get a piece of zombie snatch which was depressing to see him so desperate while at the same time equally disturbing. But, at the end of the day, he stood by the “until death do us part philosophy even though his wife was running the streets eating ass, elbows, box, and gouch.

…considering divorce as a viable option.

Shantay, Shaquita’s daughter, would have never been so down for her mom that she would want to risk her future killing folks to help feed her mom, unlike Abby.  As soon as she found out her mom was a zombie she would have raided mom’s closet for outfits, weave, and stilettos.  The news would have been a sign that she should move on with her life and finally be with her man, Busta.

On the bright side, it was nice to see a family stick together during a difficult time as the their whole family dynamic changed. For some, it’d be a difficult decision whether to say blood is thicker than zombie blood, but for me it’d be easy! Sorry Mom *Schlooook!* Body drops*

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